"If it weren't for the penis, human life would have ended with Adam and Eve.
It seems strange that something so important is so funny-looking.
I'm an author and journalist. Sometimes I write about funny things.
Some of those funny things are penises."
--Michael N. Marcus

Monday, April 6, 2015

Man creamed into co-worker's coffee

A 34-year-old Minnesota man pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge accusing him of ejaculating on a co-worker’s desk and in her coffee.

More serious charges were dropped for Robert John Lind back in November 2014, when the Ramsey County courts found that there was not enough evidence to provide probable cause that his actions constituted felony criminal sexual conduct.
An employee at Beisswenger’s hardware store in New Brighton called police on Aug. 26, 2014, saying she thought Lind, her co-worker, was leaving bodily fluids on her desk. She told police that she had found Lind standing at her desk with his back turned toward her. Lind allegedly had both of his hands in front of him near his genitals. According to the original complaint, when Lind noticed the woman he looked at her with a “deer in headlights” expression and quickly went into another room.
The woman told police she inspected her desk and noticed a strong odor that resembled urine, but was a bit different and strange. She said her coffee smelled the same way and noted that she had had an ongoing issue with a experiencing a foul taste in her coffee.
On Aug. 28, 2014, Lind met with police, said he was attracted to her and admitted to ejaculating on her desk and into her coffee on Aug. 26. He denied ejaculating into her coffee out of revenge because she had threatened to report his behavior. 


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