Gang member died after trying to gold-plate his penis

NOTE TO OUR DEAR READERS: It is extremely likely that this report is false, but it is simply too good not to publish in WWPN. It is one of those news items that "even if it's not true, it should be."

An L.A. gang member, Nazario Conchuza Gonzalez, who is part of the infamous Ms-13 gang, also called Mara Salvatrucha, has died of medical complications after attempting to gold-plate his own dick to celebrate his 17th birthday.

He is originally from El Salvador and was an active member of the MS-13 crime family. He is believed to have attempted to gold-plate his weenie with a professional automotive gold-plater stolen from a local garage.

 He was allegedly a fan of the 2002 comedy movie Goldmember, which is a loose parody of James Bond films.

Dr. Ian Joseffson of the Los Angeles Community Hospital warns of a growing trend within gang members to attempt the “deadly operation.”

“This is the third case this year . . . . It seems to be a growing trend within the gang member community”

He told reporters, “I have no idea where this idea comes from but plating one’s own genitals will only ultimately end in serious medical complications or even death, as we have seen in this case”
 
Some experts believe the tradition might find it’s roots in prehistoric Mesoamerican cultures, such as the Mayas who painted parts of their bodies with gold paint to empower themselves and as an offering to the Gods.

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Report from Teeny Weeny contest

Rolling Stone was on hand to size up the competition and capture the outrageous, electrifying proceedings. Now in its third year, the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant was founded by Aimee Arciuolo, manager of Brooklyn's Kings County Bar where the competition occurred.

"One day, I happened to take a gentleman home and he had the smallest penis I had ever seen,"Arciuolo tells Rolling Stone. "And basically that man worked so hard for my pleasure that I remember telling my friends about it the next day, saying, 'We should throw a pageant for these guys, they work much harder than guys that are well hung.'"

Among this year's competitors is Rip Van Dinkle, who read about a prior pageant and entered after realizing he both had a small penis and had never been to Brooklyn. The Puzzle Master is a returning contestant, who came up short last year, but hopes his phallic-friendly rendition of the "Goldfinger" theme — aptly renamed "Gold-dinger" — will earn him the crown.

The contest itself was divided into three categories — formal wear, swimwear and a talent show — and it's all hilariously bawdy, over-the-top and even inspiring. "America needs more orgies," bellowed one contest named Cromwell. "In that room I saw white people, I saw black people, I saw Asians, Hispanics, I saw everybody sucking each other off and it was the most beautiful picture of racial harmony I have ever seen!"

While Cromwell's heartwarming portrait of the American melting pot didn't win him the title, check out the video to see which contestants got shafted and who walked away with the crown.

Read more: http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/news/size-doesnt-matter-inside-brooklyns-smallest-penis-pageant-20150618#ixzz3dsTGeBru

Greek penis god had penis disorder (and huge penis)

A Greek god portrayed in one of Pompeii's best-known frescoes has quite the prominent feature—for better and for worse. The painting of fertility god Priapus, which survived the eruption of Mount Vesuvius, depicts a man whose dick extends nearly to his knees.

But this symbol of procreative energy and male power also contains evidence of a medical condition that can curb fertility and hinder sexual relations, medical doctor Francesco Maria Galassi said. "The disproportionate virile member is distinctively characterized by a patent phimosis, more specifically a shut phimosis," he says. 

In other words, Priapus' weenie seems to have a foreskin that couldn't fully retract: "It is a condition that causes pain, infection, and problems during sexual intercourse," Galassi adds.

So why would such a condition be shown in a fertility god? Galassi, who describes his theory in Urology, says the first-century painter may have wanted to report "a high prevalence of that anatomic defect in Pompeii." That could also explain why so many anatomical votive artifacts (showing a penis with closed foreskin at the top) were used in Pompeii between the second and fourth centuries BC to seek removal of that very condition.


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China wants to become world leader in circumcision hardware

China wants a bigger slice of the global health market and it has a new tactic for getting it: circumcision.

The World Health Organization has approved the quality and production of a Chinese circumcision device to aid HIV prevention. The disposable device, called ShangRing and named after its inventor Shang Jianzhong, is made up of two concentric plastic rings that fit over a penis, clamping its foreskin so that it can be removed easily.

The device, which doesn’t require hospital surgical facilities, will be key in reducing HIV transmission, the WHO said in a statement. Trials in African countries such as Kenya, Uganda and South Africa have shown that male circumcision reduces the risk of infection in men by 60%, the WHO said.

The approval, a so-called “prequalification” that signals international organizations that it’s okay to use the product, is meaningful for China, which wants to play a bigger role on the global health stage and burnish its image overseas by offering humanitarian aid. Though criticized for a slow response to the Ebola outbreak that mounted in West Africa last year, China contributed more than $100 million to the effort to fight the virus and has become a key player in containing it.

It’s also big news for China’s medical companies, which are trying to build prowess at home and overseas. The potential pool for profits in the Chinese healthcare market alone is projected to reach $113 billion in 2020, more than quadrupling the 2010 profit from the sector, according to consultancy Bain & Co. The global profit pool by 2020 is expected to reach $740 billion, according to Bain.

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Jockstrap malfunction? LeBron James’s penis flashed in basketball game

The Golden State Warriors may have won Game 4 of the NBA Finals on June 11, but LeBron James’ penis was the real star of the show.

After ABC accidentally flashed the 30-year-old Cleveland Cavaliers star’s penis to the world during the game, Twitter exploded. Fans couldn’t believe what had just happened, and they shared their shock on social media.

The match-up between the Cleveland Cavaliers and Golden State Warriors is getting seriously intense, but it was “LeBronsDick” that became the top trending topic from Game 4 of the NBA Finals. LeBron’s manhood was accidentally shown live on air as the NBA superstar adjusted his shorts. Needless to say, fans totally freaked out on Twitter after catching a glimpse of LeBron’s member.

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ALSO

Transplanted penis produced pregnancy, but maybe without much fun

A man in South Africa who underwent a penis transplant has impregnated his girlfriend, according to news reports.

But it's not clear whether the man's transplanted penis works the same way an undamaged penis would, said Dr. Andrew Kramer, a urologist at the University of Maryland Medical Center (who wasn't involved in the transplant).

The penis is not necessary for a man to ejaculate or urinate, so it's possible that the man's transplanted penis doesn't function completely normally, Kramer said. Ejaculation is controlled by the spinal cord and does not require the penis; the rhythmic contraction of pelvic muscles forces semen outward, as if from the bulb of a syringe, he said.

It's possible the man could ejaculate without the penis getting erect, he added. "Maybe ejaculate just dripped out," and he got the woman pregnant, Kramer told Live Science.

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Man broke penis falling from Chinese motorcycle taxi while watching porn

A Chinese man is suing for $65,000 after he broke his penis by falling off the a motorcycle taxi while watching pornography on his smart phone.

The man had been on the back of the bike in Shanghai with another customer and the driver in front of him when they went over a speed bump.

He was unable to keep balance so fell off the back of the vehicle. One hand was holding the phone and the other hand may have been holding his weenie.

(Funny video at page linked below.)

Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3118857/Man-breaks-penis-falling-Chinese-taxi-motorbike-watching-pornography-phone-sat-driver-passenger.html#ixzz3ckPidmPh

You may soon be able to buy a seal penis. What will you do with it?

Sales of Canadian seal products could get a lift if the federal Fisheries Department adopts a plan that, among other things, calls for the revival of the controversial seal penis trade.

The report, drafted by the Fur Institute of Canada, is aimed at creating new markets to support an earlier proposal to kill 140,000 grey seals over five years in the southern Gulf of St. Lawrence — 70 per cent of the grey seals that frequent the area.

Fishermen have long complained that a growing population of grey seals is to blame for eating too many commercially valuable fish, which has resulted in repeated calls for a cull.

The Fur Institute says its five-year plan, dated March 2014, focuses on creating markets for a number of products that could be derived using every part of the seal carcass. "The penises of juvenile and adult animals may be dried and sold as sexual enhancement products, particularly to Asian buyers," says the report, obtained through the access to information act.

"Asian consumers, particularly athletes, also consume a beverage called Dalishen Oral Liquid that is made from seal penis and testicles, which they believe to be energizing and performance enhancing."

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Photo from CalTech. Thanks.

Man with erect penis ejected from naked bike ride

English bicyclists looking to take part in Cambridge's upcoming first naked bike ride will hope for better luck than one rider in Kent, who was removed by police after becoming "over-excited" in a preview ride.

The naked rides, which take place around the world, are organized to highlight the dangers cyclists face from cars.

One witness said: ''Everyone was taking their clothes off to get ready for the ride. I heard gasps and I turned around -- it was a horrible sight.

"It's fair to say he was overexcited and got aroused. It looked like he was enjoying the event a bit too much. One of the organizers went over to him and told him to put his trousers on while speaking on a walkie-talkie to police. The man looked sheepish when he was spoken to by the police."

In a response to complaints posted on Facebook, ride organizer Barry Freeman said: "We do not accept this behavior and he was dealt with and removed before the ride started."
Organizers had previously told participants: "The police have confirmed they WILL act on ANY inappropriate behavior and we, the organizers will support that. If you are coming just to be a pain in the neck and to be the one to end this WNBR we'd rather you stayed at home."


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‘Over-enthusiastic’ Irish bull broke his penis

An "over-enthusiastic" prize Irish bull has been replaced after he broke his penis.

Farmer Tommy Moyles, from Cork, southern Ireland, said it was the first time he could remember such an incident in 10 years of farming. "I don't know exactly what happened, but the bull was probably over-enthusiastic in his few days out," said Moyles.

"I would have loved to have kept the original bull, but the risks were too great so he was sold. I had to be practical," said Moyles.

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Photo from http://wildlife-photographs.blogspot.com/2013/02/Bull-Cow.html. Thanks.

Do male androids have penises?

An android (or "droid" on Star Wars) is supposed to be a robot that could seem like a human being.

There is little chance that C3PO or R2D2 would be confused with Johnny Depp or Bernie Sanders. However, Star Trek's Mr. Data, despite his strange complexion, looked quite homo sapienesque.

C3P0 and R2D2 ran around naked and exhibited no obvious male appendages. Data, however, usually wore a standard Star Trek uniform that could have been concealing an artificial weenie, crafted by his "father," Dr. Soong.

There has been speculation about Data's equipment, desires, abilities and experiences. Apparently he and Tasha Yar did the deed. ("She was special to me. We were... intimate.")

Also, Data said that he is "fully functional."

And now you know. At least one android had a penis.

As for whether or not Superman could have been circumcised, we'll deal with that another time.