"If it weren't for the penis, human life would have ended with Adam and Eve.
It seems strange that something so important is so funny-looking.
I'm an author and journalist. Sometimes I write about funny things.
Some of those funny things are penises."
--Michael N. Marcus

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Why don't basketball players wear penis-protection?

The fabulous Fugs sang in "Boobs A Lot":

Well, down on the football,
Football field,
You never can tell
What a heel can wield,

So you gotta wear your jock a lot.
(You gotta wear your jock a lot.)
Jock a lot, jock a lot.
(You gotta wear your jock a lot.)

I thought that penile protection was universal in men's sports, but apparently not.
According to Slate, This year’s playoffs have been tough on NBA players’ groins. Draymond Green kicked things off when he swung his leg between Steven Adams’ legs during the Western Conference Finals. Dahntay Jones clocked Bismack Biyombo in the testicles in the Eastern Conference Finals, Matthew Dellavedova punched Andre Iguodala’s crotch in Game 1 of the NBA Finals, and then Green struck again with a “retaliatory swipe” to the groin of LeBron James in Game 4, a move which got him suspended from Monday night’s Game 5.

These below-the-belt hits raised a slew of questions about the players’ intentions and what constitutes a flagrant foul. But it also brought to mind a more fundamental issue: Why weren’t any of these guys wearing cups?

Because, despite recent evidence to the contrary, playing professional basketball isn’t all that perilous for one’s family jewels. Earlier this year, ESPN’s Tom Haberstroh wrote a comprehensive account of testicular trauma in the NBA. For that piece, he spoke to Dr. Stephen Strup, the chief of urology at the University of Kentucky, who explained that the discomfort of wearing a cup isn’t worth it given the minimal risk of getting hit in the nether regions. “There isn’t enough of an issue to wear a cup,” Strup said. “It’s hard to generate enough pressure for major injuries to occur in basketball. You see the guys go out, they’re uncomfortable and they can’t function a little bit, but usually they’re back in a few minutes.”

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